The... Upcoming Crap

Thought I'd just take the time to make a post about what I have planned for this blog in the next few weeks or months or whatever. To start off, I haven't been enthused to write anything really this month because of shit happening. So sorry about that.

Moving on, I will be starting to do some reviews of various "games" and "movies" that I always see online in my ongoing quest for weird shit to talk about on this site. For example, I have seen this game called 'Guilty Train Molester Man 2' a number of times at various forums where you can download cracked games and so forth... and my mind just sits there and wonders aloud: what the fuck?!

Is that not one of the strangest titles you have seen for a computer game? It shouldn't come as no surprise though that the game comes from Japan, where there is an ongoing epidemic of men molesting people on trains daily. This game is probably based upon a true story.

To top it off though, it is a fucking sequel! Can you believe that the first one sold enough to justify the creation of a second installment? Wow... the first one must be fucking awesome, because I haven't seen a third one, so maybe this second one isn't that good. We'll see when I eventually get around to downloading it and playing through it.

Apart from that, I will continue to look for bad porn to post, and I will get around to making a new installment in the 'Series of Personal Challenges' that I started a while ago now. I just need to come up with something worthy so that the French people who enjoyed me trying to gratify myself will enjoy it.

The... Breakin'

Over the last few days, i've been scouring the internet downloading things from my childhood. Music, video games, television shows and movies mostly.

One of the things that I am happy to get a hold of, is some of the music from Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo. This movie has been a favourite of mine from before I can remember, and listening to the music unattached from the movie is awesome.

I was just sitting here, reading stuff on Wikipedia when all of a sudden the next song on my playlist in Winamp is Ice T - Combat. It kicked all sorts of ass, but I have to say I was disappointed that there isn't someone yelling "TKO" at the end.

Is there anything in this world more awesome than Breakin' 2? I highly doubt it, as evidenced by the fact that everyone uses it's subtitle whenever a sequel to a popular movie is announced. Most people don't even know where the hell the whole Electric Boogaloo thing comes from... THAT is how awesome the movie is.

I've gone mad recently with the shit i'm downloading. I've started downloading a 200GB collection of the classic series of Doctor Who. That is, all the surviving serials, along with recreations of episodes missing. Already watched the first part of 'The Mutants', more commonly known as 'The Daleks'... quite awesome.

I've also had a little bit of money recently, and decided to buy a DVD that I spotted. That DVD?

Dark Angel.

I know, it sounds like i've gone and turned into a lamer, buying a copy of the bad TV series starring Jessica Alba, but fret not... this is no lame TV series.

You see, Dark Angel is the alternate title of a movie starring Dolph Lundgren, which was released in the USA under the infinitely stupid title 'I Come In Peace', which is a line that the main villian constantly says. In fact, it might be the only thing he says, apart from the odd grunt or weird hiss. The villian is in fact played by Matthias Hues who is one of those "hey, it's that guy" type of actors. You don't know their names, but when you see them, you just KNOW who they are.


But anyway, like I said... I bought this movie. Is it a good movie? Barely. It's pretty predictable. A cop loses his partner in a drug bust gone wrong, gets assigned a new partner who is a stickler for the rules, investigates shit, gets caught in the ministrations of an intergalactic drug dealer, becomes friends with new partner... and so on.

You know, typical 80's cop drama with awesome one-liners.

"Argghhhhhh... I come in peace."
"And you go in pieces, asshole."

Brllnt.